Through tables, darkly
Once upon a time, Nia Jax put Lana through a table, and it was good.
She went through a table.
She went through a table.
She went through a table.
Somewhere along the line, it got old, and still… she went through a table.
She went through a table.
She went through a table.
She went through a table.
Lana picked up an ally in the form of Raw Women’s Champion Asuka, and still… she went through a table.
She went through a table.
She went through a table.
She went through a table.
Lo and behold, after months of being put through tables and belittled, Lana earned my sympathies, and still… she went through a table.
She went through a table.
She went through a table.
She went through a table.
And then… she and Asuka started getting momentum. Victories, over Jax and Shayna Baszler, the tag champs. Yes, Asuka was the stronger half of the team, but Lana was pulling her own weight and doing her best. It was honestly heartwarming, and made for a strong build to a title match at Tables, Ladders, & Chairs.
She even got to beat Nia in a singles match…
She went to the local medical facility.
She was out of the match.
She went through all those tables… and now she’s not even in the match.
Step aside from the reality of wrestling for a moment, folks. I know it’s hard, we’re all so jaded by WWE’s way of doing business, but think about Lana, the character.
She’s a long, long way from the confident days of “Rusev, crush!”
She was left adrift in the wake of her alliance with Bobby Lashley fading into the distance as he made waves with MVP and the Hurt Business.
But then she forged a partnership with Natalya, and they started to gain some minor success as a tag team… and then after a series of losses, Nattie dropped her like so much dead weight.
She went through a table.
Something changed.
She went through a table.
Lana could have given up, but she kept coming out to compete every week.
She went through a table.
She was scared, but she found her strength.
She went through a table.
Table after table after table, but she kept going.
To be taken out now? At her moment of triumph? To be told that the mind is willing but the flesh is weak? That she could go through a table every week and keep walking but a beatdown and some targeted submissions from Baszler is the end?
“Sorry, thanks for playing but you lost your chance and we’re gonna let Asuka pick a new tag partner.”
Heartbreaking.
Of course, this is pro wrestling, and maybe this is a bait-and-switch and Lana will come down bandaged but ready to fight, and this will end up being the David and Goliath story it was shaping up to be.
Maybe that remixed Also Sprach Zarathustra will hit and Charlotte Flair will come down and add to her already impressive resume.
Maybe Asuka will refuse to find another partner and lose a handicap match, fighting a valiant but futile battle against the champions.
Lots of things could happen, but one thing is constant…
Lana went through a table, again and again, but she never gave up.
Will Nia Jax and Shayna Baszler keep their grip on the tag titles, or can Asuka and whoever her partner ends up being wrest them away?
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